President Obama and Governor Brewer Were Actually Talking About Real Scorpions
A few days ago President Barack Obama landed at Phoenix-Mesa Gateway Airport to briefly speak to a group of Intel employees in Chandler, AZ. By the following morning the President’s arrival was the buzz of every news outlet, radio and talk show across the country. Not for anything he told those Intel employees, but for an exchange he had with Airzona’s Governor, Jan Brewer, over comments she made about him in her book, Scorpions For Breakfast.
It just so happens that Gateway Airport is literally across the street from us. We hear planes coming in and out all day long.
We’re not here to despute or discuss the differing politics between President Obama and the Governor. After all, we kill things for a living. But if their conversation was indeed about Brewer’s book, we were considering their real conversation on the tarmac.
Obama: “Do you REALLY eat scorpions for breakfast?”
Brewer: “Let me tell you! They’re a little bland, but if you put some sugar on them they are amazing.”
Or, Obama: “I hear you only have bark scorpions here.”
Brewer: “Yeah, but they’re the most poisonous in the nation, so take that!”
Or maybe, Obama: “I had 3 scorpions for breakfast.”
Brewer: “Yeah, well I eat scorpions bigger than you for breakfast!”
Or our favorite, Obama: “I hear you have scorpions in this state. You know of a reliable pest control company that guarantees their scorpion control?”
Brewer: “There is only ONE in this entire state that guarantees their scorpion service. It’s Bulwark Exterminating. That’s why they get rave reviews on Google.”
But the hilarity doesn’t even stop there. The following day, Brewer’s book, sold on Amazon for $15.59, saw a 1.3M percent increase in less than 24 hours. Yes, you read that right. One. Point. Three. MILLION.
If you ever need to sell a product, just wave your finger in the face of the leader of the free world…and watch them Benjamins roll on in.